my happy.

The Young Women lesson this week in church was about finding joy in womanhood. We had a guest speaker come and talk to us about the things that brought her happiness. Later that day I went visiting teaching. My companion gave an awesome message from this talk. She talked about how we need to focus on the little things that we have been blessed with, to be patient with ourselves, and to be happy now.

Both of these lessons were prepared for other people, but I felt like they were meant for me. I needed the reminder to be grateful for the things that I have now instead of always looking for the things I wish I could have. Some days I feel like I get caught up in always wanting more. A bigger house, a flatter stomach, to be the perfect wife, and to always know how to discipline my feisty toddler. I have been so blessed, and sometimes I take things for granted instead of remembering to be grateful.

As much as I love staying home with my babies, it can be really difficult at times. During the past week I had been feeling frustrated with everything. Looking back I see that I was wasting time on things that were not of real importance. I wasn't doing anything bad, but I was going through my day with the wrong attitude. I was worried about just getting things done, and counting down the hours till bedtime so that I would have time at the end of the day to relax by myself. Instead I should have been enjoying my day and time with my family.

I have been blessed with so many things that I sometimes take for granted. I have a great calling, a ward that I love, a home that is warm and clean (usually), parents and a family that loves me, and a healthy body.

I am so blessed to have the chance to be a mom to such sweet daughters. I found two little teeth just barely cutting through Gracelyn's gums today! She is growing so fast...which shouldn't surprise me at all. This milestone means that she is no longer my little infant anymore. It is a bitter/sweet realization. It is so fun to watch her do new things. But I already miss the my day old, week old, and month old baby. Is it possible to be baby hungry when I still have a baby? (Don't worry Ryan you don't have to worry about that anytime soon!) Gracelyn is the BEST baby. She literally is always happy and smiling. She loves just to be held, talked to, and sung to. Every morning when I go get her out of her crib she smiles at me like I am her favorite person in the world. (Lets be honest--I am! Although, I'm not sure my husband would agree...) It melts my heart every time. Addison has such a funny spunky little personality, and she keeps me laughing all day long. It is fun doing things with her that I never was able to do with a sister growing up. She loves to have her nails painted, to dress up like a princess, to play Barbies, and to help me cook in the kitchen.

I have a husband that loves me so much, and he takes such great care of our family. Ryan is the most motivated person that I know. He is so busy all of the time, and yet he always is looking for opportunities to serve others. He is always trying to be better. At his job, as a Dad, as my husband, at everything. If he sees himself having a weakness, he works at it until it becomes a strength. He is a great example of this to me. Last night I was grumpy and had a headache and he rubbed my neck and shoulder for over two hours. TWO HOURS! I am a massage therapist and I never give him that long of a back massage. He is awesome. I love him and I am so glad that he is mine.

My goal for the next week is to really be grateful for the little things that I have in my life. I don't want to take the blessing that I have been given for granted, and though I know that I am not perfect, and the purpose of this life isn't to just float along in bliss all of the time (what kind of test would that be?), I want to find joy in the little things.